Book Review: Evening is the Whole Day

WARNING: SPOILER ALERT!

So, this is the book I've been reading for the pass two months. I'm pretty sure it has been that long. I don't usually take so long to finish a novel. But life here in UK has been pretty hectic with all the assignments and homework. Whatever free time I have I spend Facebooking and YouTubing since the internet connection here is just simply amazing!

So basically, the story is pretty cool. It's about a dysfunctional well-to-do slightly upper middle class Indian family living in post-independence Malaysia in the city of Ipoh.

Chellam

Chellam is the poor maid of the household. She cooks and cleans sometimes, but there are other servants for that, like the cook Lourdesmarry. Chellam's main job is to take care of Patti (which means Grandma in Tamil), the old lady of the house. Coming from the rubber plantation, she is of the lower class Malaysian Indian and displays all the negative stereotypes of her people. She speaks broken English, curses in front of the kids, has no fashion sense whatsoever, wears over sized men's clothes, had not finished school, does not own a birth certificate, the eldest of many siblings and is the daughter of a drunkard.

Chellam is constantly the victim of verbal abuse in the household. The kids, particularly the middle one Suresh often makes fun of her social background for he looks down upon her upbringing. Patti, who Chellam looks after, has almost never spoken to her with respect, which explains why Chellam secretly despises the old lady.

One day, Patti falls down in the bathroom and dies. Aasha, the mysterious youngest child of the family claims to have seen Chellam pushing Patti down by accident. Whether this is completely true or not will be revealed later on in the novel, which makes it so interesting. Chellam does not protest and simply accepts her faith and is forced to return to her abusive father's home.

Aasha

Aasha, the youngest one is a character you will definitely fell some pity for. Her elder brother, Suresh is her playmate, but she craves for the attention and love of her eldest sibling, her sister Uma.

What makes Aasha's character so interesting is that she can see ghosts. After Patti dies, she sees her ghost on certain occasions. But most often, it is with the Anglo-Chinese daughter of the former Scottish owner of her family's house (often referred to as the Big House) that she communicates with.

Aasha is the one responsible for putting the blame on Chellam, even though she saw with her own eyes Uma pushing Patti. But she puts the blame on Chellam instead, hoping that Uma would feel grateful and become her cheerful and happy self once again. But that does not happen.

Aasha is my favourite character. It is easy to feel sorry for her. She might be the only character who has no bad judgement towards anyone. All she craves for is some real love and some real attention from her family, especially her elder sister Uma who keeps avoiding her. You might even shed a tear of two in the last chapter when you discover what happens to Uma, that despite everything, her love is betrayed.

Suresh

This is the character I simply hate. He reminds me of that urban Indian boy who is intelligent but behaves in a very uneducated manner, cracking dirty jokes and making fun of those who he feels is beneath him. You must give credit to the writer for portraying Suresh so realistically. Despite his parents being strict whenever they need to, he mostly gets away with this annoying behaviour of his.

I am pretty sure the writer intended Suresh to have some highly metaphorical and symbolic role in the discovery of the real cause of Patti's death, but I'm still yet to understand it.

You see, Suresh mistakens his Amma (meaning 'mother' in Tamil) as Patti's killer. Amma entered Patti's bathroom while Chellam was out doing some chores before the real culprit entered and performed the deed. Suresh only saw Amma entering the bathroom, while Aasha witnessed the real culprit.

Despite her young age, Aasha understands that only she knows the truth and that even Suresh had mistakenly assumed someone else was responsible for their grandmother's death. But she remains silent for the sake of Uma.

You might grow to hate Suresh as you read the novel. He constantly harasses Chellam for being poor, and it is only his mother that corrects him whenever she notices his misbehaviour. But if Suresh was a real person, you yourself might want to give him a spanking or two.

Uma

Yes. The real culprit. The eldest child. The smart one. The one who could memorize Shakespeare at such a young age. The one who has set a good example for her younger siblings. The one who would be furthering her studies in The States. The idol of her younger siblings. The love of her grandmother. The source of pride of her father. The envy of her own mother.

She has it all - the looks, the brains, the social status, the education. But the writer leaves the readers confused as to why she is so moody and distant from the rest of the family. In the middle of the story, she leaves us further puzzled after what she does to her own grandmother, despite it being a pure act of emotion. More like an accident due to the snap of a brain nerve. Still, an accident.

The writer left me simply baffled as I slowly approached the climax. Uma was abused by someone she loved. Someone who had sworn to protect and care for her. Someone who if mentioned would make you gasp. I could hardly believe what I read. I both admired and was furious at the writer for this shock. But it was the perfect explanation for Uma's mysterious behaviour all along.

Patti knows of this. But instead of protecting Uma like she always did when Uma was a child, Patti chooses to ignore this, because she herself is disgusted by what she sees. Her room was just next to Uma's. But she moves to the ground floor by citing her old age as a reason, that her legs can no longer carry her up and down the stairs.

As Uma prepares to leave the country, she swears to never return to her family. She is thankful to Chellam, who is barely older than her, for taking the blame of Patti's death. As she prepares to board the plane, she turns around and waves goodbye specifically to her younger sister, the one who she failed to love despite everything she had done for her. Earlier in the novel, Uma realizes Aasha craves for her attention as their cranky mother had failed to deliver that. But she purposely ignores Aasha in an attempt to make her feel bad, just like how she was feeling after she was abused.

But the incident in the airport lets us know that Uma still loves Aasha, even though she will never return to her, or reply her letter, or answer her phone calls. The story of Uma and Aasha is a tragic one. In the last chapter, you can't help feeling sorry for the two sister. The sisters who grew up in a wealthy household, but whose family's bad decisions destroyed their lives.

Patti

This is one character you will both love, and then hate. In the flashback scenes, you will see what a social-conscious freak she is. She forbids her son, Appa (father of Uma, Suresh and Aasha) from marrying Amma, since she is from a poorer family. But as any old parent depending on their working children for survival during their last days, she is forced to give in when Appa has made up his mind to marry Amma.

She is not ashamed to show her clear dislike and hatred for her daughter-in-law, often embarrassing her whenever she has the chance. But as Patti grows older, she in turn becomes the object of Amma's anger when the daughter-in-law slaps and beats her each time they are in an argument, whenever Appa is not around of course. At this point, you can't help but feel sorry for Patti as much as you feel sorry for Aasha.

But then Patti turns her anger towards poor Chellam, who is often yelled at whenever she does not get things done the way Patti wants.

Patti is, however, caring and protective towards her grandchildren, especially Uma when she was younger. During one chapter, a young Uma sleeps with Patti after she hears her parents yelling at each other all night. On that night, Patti promises to protect Uma forever. At this point on, Uma looks up to Patti as her guardian angel, which explains Uma's anger towards her once protective grandmother after the night of her abuse.

Towards the end of the novel, it is revealed that Patti had a dark past herself. When Tata, her husband, was not around, she was having an affair with his white boss. Nobody knows this. Nobody, except Uncle Ballroom, her second son and Appa's younger brother.

Uncle Ballroom

He is somewhat like an outsider to the family. He visits the family twice in the novel. Both visits are contrastingly different. He gets his name because he is an active participant of ballroom dancing competitions across the world. But Appa disapproves of this, for Uncle gambles all his money away, and then returns home with the hope that Appa would help him.

Uncle was subjected to having witnessed the sexual abuse of two women close to his heart - his own mother, Patti during his childhood; and his own niece, Uma during his first visit in the novel. The first incident traumatized him as a child, and he suddenly remembers it after witnessing what happened to Uma.

His visits are always highly anticipated by the children, since he always has interesting stories of far-off lands to tell them. And he is always there to listen to Suresh's dirty jokes. During his second visit, he pities Chellam after witnessing her mistreatment at the hands of his own family. He occasionally gives her money, even going to the extend of bribing her father to not abuse her. This sparks off rumours within his own family, as they suspect he has been sleeping with Chellam.

But like Chellam, he is accused of something he did not do, for being the one who abused Uma during his first visit, and is unceremoniously turned out of his family home. Patti does nothing to help her second son, probably being too traumatized after witnessing what had happened to her beloved Uma. Probably she is reminded of what had happened to her during her own youth.

Amma

Hah! A really engaging character. You will dislike her, but you won't hate her. You might feel sorry for her, but you most definitely won't love her.

Amma, whose real name is Vasanthi, comes from a poorer urban family. Her father is just a clerk and her mother is recluse. She is always compared to her more successful younger brother. Because of this, she forever hates herself for not being as classy as those around her.

So during her courtship with Appa, it is the first time she is actually respected as a human being. Speaking about their courtship, there is no dating in its true sense, but all is done in a typical conservative manner. Her younger siblings are to follow her and Appa during their 'dates'. Appa sweeps Amma off her feet when he defends her before her father and brother. But when he has sex with her during their first night, she feels no desire for him, only pain. But she accepts it as her role as a good wife.

Despite their awkward marriage, they make it through with three healthy children. It was after Uma's birth when they became a true couple, and it was after Aasha was born when they both ended up becoming like two total strangers living under the same roof. She nags all the time while he stays up late night away from home, in the office as he claims.

Amma secretly envies Uma. She makes it clear that she feels distant from not only Uma, but the rest of the family. They speak of 'high-class' stuff, things that she knows nothing of. Even her Malay is bad. Also, she has the ugly looks of the typical Tamil Indian. The writer gives so much detail to her looks - the dark skin, frizzy hair... it is almost disgustingly true.

Not to mention how abusive she is towards Patti - her way of getting revenge for how she herself was mistreated when she first became the daughter-in-law of the house. Amma is only mean towards Chellam after she is accused of Patti's death. Before that, she reprimands Suresh for calling Chellam a servant, and for disrespecting someone old enough to be his elder sister. Perhaps she sees Chellam as a younger version of her, a girl from a less-privileged background stepping into the household of a famous lawyer.

Appa

Oh yes! Advocate Rajasekhar, one of the top lawyers in the city. In his youth as a a law student in Oxford, he was quite the playboy. He remembers details of his flings with equally modern and successful modern women even when he is making love to Amma. He was clear of his vision of his future. These urban, liberal-minded woman were just to sleep around with. His ideal match for a wife can never be as perfect as Amma; the quiet, traditional Indian girl next door.

But married life was not as he expected. As his wife climbed the social ladder and became the wife of one of the country's most famous lawyers, she turned into a diva, always nagging and always complaining, Appa only came to know of the other side of Amma after years of marriage.

Gone were the days when she would admire his beefy physique from the window of her father's house, and he would be her prince charming, always sweet and tender towards her.

As you read through the book, the idea of Appa being the good husband and father - the almost perfect family man comes to you immediately. It is only towards the end of the novel where the writer smack you on the face with the truth of Appa's so-called 'late nights at the office'.

It turns out Appa has a Chinese mistress. She is nothing different from Amma - relatively unattractive, homely and a nagger, as it turns out. As her husband is away in China for years, she makes a living by selling noodles at a stall. Appa actually gives her a life - buying her a decent house, financing her trips to Singapore and Hong Kong, and providing her with Chindian children!

Before the truth of Appa's second family, his mistress, his illegitimate children, his infidelity and the tarnishing of his image as a good family man sinks into your head, the writer smacks another unbearable truth on your face.

Incest...

The abuse of Uma. Appa blamed Uncle Ballroom, when in reality it was him. Having come home drunk after he was chased out of his mistress' house following the return of her husband, he turns to Uma for solace. And then he could not control himself. The alcohol got to him. Even though no clothes came off their bodies that night, it still happened. The damage was done.

And thus, the once cheerful Uma was now the moody and always solemn distant figure. No matter how much Appa regretted for letter the alcohol take control over him, he could never face his first born ever again. He would not enter her room, let alone allow himself to pass by it. Patti, having seen this incident that night, is disgusted and ashamed. The only time she ever calls out Appa's name is whenever she is abused by Amma every time he is not home. And she almost has no contact with her favourite granddaughter ever again. Her attention is now turned to Chellam, and making her life a living hell.

Not just a family drama

So there are some striking resemblance between this novel and Atonement. But unlike the character in the latter, Aasha knows what she saw. And her decision to lie was made fully consciously.

It is a political story in a way. There is a chapter on May 13. After some disagreements with Patti and Appa, Amma takes Uma away for a visit to her sister's home in Kuala Lumpur while she was nine months pregnant with Suresh. The bloody-dirty-minded-smarty-pants Suresh was born on May 13th as many people died, which most probably explains his terrible behaviour.

There is some foreshadowing of the dark event on the train from Ipoh to Kuala Lumpur as a Malay man in broken English comments on Amma not knowing what kereta api (which is Malay for train) meant. Later, the car bringing Amma to the hospital is stopped by a violent crowd. But somehow, Suresh is born on the night that would remain a black mark on our country's great history.

Then, there is Mat Din (Appa's driver), who secretly participates in the protest of minority rights, having felt ashamed all his life for having to work as the driver for an Indian family.

Appa himself is on a silent lifelong protest as he refuses to converse in Malay, as he feels it is degrading to his image as a member of a minority group. Mostly, he is ashamed of his own people. He is the reason Aasha and Suresh look down on factory girls who are mostly Indians, since Malays are helped by the government and the poor Chinese are helped by the rich Chinese. In the last chapter, Appa and Amma comment on two Indian youngsters fighting in public, which they take personally as a disgrace to their race.

My verdict

I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed reading this novel. It moves at a rather slow pace and you might get tired of the overly detailed description. The writer is very outspoken about her inner conflicts with some sections of the Malaysian community that it might just shock you.

Like the writer, I am of Tamil Malaysian origin myself. Perhaps this helped me relate so much to the characters as if I was part of their family. Others might struggle through the liberal use of Manglish and the occasional Tamil diction. But for those of you who are interested in learning different cultures, this book is more than that. It is a window into the the urban yet traditional household of a typical Tamil-speaking Indian family.

The reason I truly enjoyed this novel is not because of my shared background with the author and the main characters of the novel. It is probably because of the realism the novel depicts. No character is flawless as they are all modeled to perfection with their flaws as the main ingredient. That is why you will either very much like them, or very much hate them. It has everything from dark comedy to drama, romance, tragedy and tidbits of fantasy.

I would highly recommend this book to anyone. I give it (ceh wah!!!!!!!! prasan critic profesional la ni ek?) four and a half out of five stars!

A Prophecy Come True

There is a myth that goes, if you toss a coin into the Trevi Fountain in Rome, you will visit the great city again one day.

I don't usually believe this kind of stuff. But today, I suppose I have to change my mind a little.

And do you know why?

HELL YES! COZ I'M GOING THERE... AGAIN!

This was way back in 2005 if I remember correctly. I was fifteen. They say you can make a wish as you toss a coin into the fountain. At that time, I did not have any internet connection at home. So, that was one reason to not research about the place properly.

The real myth goes like this. You are supposed to toss three coins. The first one is for you to return to Rome someday. The second one is to fall in love with a Roman. The third one is so that you can marry that Roman and live happily ever after. Pretty cool, right?

But I wished for me to get straight 'A's for my PMR instead. Yes! I was a nerd in secondary school... and nothing much has changed. You can see that yourself from the photos. Pretty lame haircut, pretty lame winter clothes, pretty lame accessories... that was me. Some say it is still me.

Okay, so this is about Rome, not about me. Sorry for the sidetrack. Next!

So, going to Rome was like basically a dream come true. The only sad part was that my parents could not follow us on the trip. I have always wished that on my second trip, if there would ever be one, I would really want them to come along.

Well, I suppose you gain some, you loose some. Maybe on my third trip perhaps, I can get them to come along!

So, back then, before there was Hannah Montana, i-Carly, Wizards of Waverly Place, Suite Life of Zack and Cody and there other teen TV shows, there was one that I have to shamefully admit was my all time favourite - Lizzie McGuire, starring the super duper hot Hillary Duff.

And when the movie version come out, which concludes the storyline of the TV series, my siblings, cousins and I were among the first in Malaysia to go watch it in the cinema. We even waited for the DVD to be released.

So in the movie, Lizzie travels to Rome. She does nothing of the three-coin-tossing thing. She simply tosses it once, and POOF! There she has her prince charming standing right before her. What was his name? Paolo, or something. Turns out he was an ass in the end (SPOILER ALERT!)

But, yeah. She does not quite get her prince charming. But her dream of living the live of fame and glamour come true! Now, I was a sensible teenager, okay? I did not secretly have dreams of suddenly going to Rome and becoming a world famous pop star or anything? But still, it was around that time Malaysian Idol was hot stuff with the super talented Jacklyn Victor winning the reality show! So, you can't blame me for having such aspirations at that age. I was just being part of the crow.

Okay! Sidetracked again. Let's move on!

Right. So the first popular place we actually visited in Rome was The Vatican. Well, technically it's not in Rome since it is an independent city-state by itself. But still, Rome kind of surround it. So, you can say it's in Rome alright. Nobody is going to arrest you!

The question I'm often asked is, if I met the Pope? You know what?

YES, WE DID!!!!!!!!!!

In our dreams of course. No, we did not meet the Pope, unfortunately. I'm sure he has better work to do then randomly come out and say hello to tourists down at the square place.

I remember going inside the building. It was a closed area of course. But with natural lighting, the place was relatively well lightened. My aunt was really amazed by this. I had no time for that. I could not stop staring at the gigantic statues all around me!

I'm not sure if you have noticed a certain pattern in these photos. But do watch closely and you will notice something weird... and quite irritating. Gosh!

Please don't laugh. But my mom made me where that pouch at the front of my tummy. She said it makes it easier for me to reach out for my inhaler in case I had an asthma attack. She also made me keep my notebook and some other stuff in there. It further enhanced my clown-look, that's for sure.

Watching the change-of-guard was pleasurable. It amazes me how one can just stand there and hardly blink. I remember bluffing my cousin that he does not even breath. And she was all amazed and was asking question after question on how he could not die, and that maybe he was guarding the Vatican, so God gave him some magical powers to stay still or something.

I don't suppose I can cheat my BFFs with whom I'm travelling with this time since they're all generally smarter than I am. That may be one let-down. Huhu...

I don't remember going for a horse ride on a carriage. But then, there is this picture to bluff people about it.

I suppose I have my cousin Shashi to thank, since he was our unofficial tour guide for the entire day. He's the gentleman in grey with his arms around the dude in the orange and the lady in purple. Trust me, it surely must have been one hell of a job as my uncle and aunt can never agree on one thing. It is always this, then that, then this again, then that again. And when we have chosen that, we go, "This was much better". Poor guy.

Oh! Beautiful! Beautiful Rome!

Yup. That's us in front of St. Angelo's Castle. Note that it's shaped like a crown, right? It is just a mere walking distance from the Vatican.

Rome is home to hundreds, maybe thousands of fountains. This is one of the most beautiful ones.

This is the Pantheon. You can walk here from the Vatican if you want too as well. According to our beloved tour guide a.k.a Shashi, it used to be a temple of Zeus. Being an enthusiast of Greek mythology (ceh wah!) I know Zeus as the king of the gods. But after Rome became a Papal state, the temple was converted into a Roman Catholic church. If you look closer, you might notice the little holes on the roof. They are bullet marks left during World War II.

Speaking about the fountains, did I mention that the water that flows from them are actually drinkable? Free water!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The following day, we traveled to Tivoli. This one is situated in the more hilly area of Rome in the city's outskirts. Rome might be a metropolitan city, but it's not like New York, or London, or Toronto, or even Kuala Lumpur. Rome still maintains the ancient-ness of its city. I hardly came across any skyscrapers. Also there were many farms and orchards in these king of parts of the city.

You can only describe it in one word - magnificent! I remember seeing a painting on the ceiling of the Greek gods. I managed to impress my cousins (yet again! hehehehehe....) by knowing all their names. I don't remember making up any names because I really do know almost all Greek gods by name. It's true!

Tak percaya sudah!

After coming back to Rome after ending our tour around other countries, we visited the Colosseum and the Roman Forum.

Can you imagine how much history this place stores? I did not enter the place. I just saw it from the outside. It was simply mind-blowing to visit such an iconic place that I have only read of in books and saw in movies.

Speaking of movies, I was so amazed by the Colosseum (I still can't spell it right!) that when we went back to my uncle's apartment, we dug up a DVD of the movie Gladiator and watched it all night!

One of my all-time favourite movies. Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix and director Ridley Scott simply rock! The background score by Hans Zimmer was simply haunting... in a good way of course. Not really historically accurate, but still a decent epic movie.

Oops! Sidetracked yet again!

Back to business. Yup. Oh yes! This is a reminder for myself and anyone of you out there who are planning a trip to Rome. Now watch the photo below closely...

Now, what's so interesting about them, you might ask. They're just a bunch of guys dressed in ancient Roman costumes. This is not my photo, though. Just one I copied from the net. Back in 2005, I wanted to take pictures with them. I suppose that's what they do, right? But Shashi told me in Malay, "Woi! Satgi depa nak duit taw!"

And I was like, "Well, duh!" But, he pulled me away instead of letting me take a photo with those guys. Until recently, I was not really clear why he did that. I assumed it was because they would charge too much of money. But after reading the Facebook status of a senior of mine who just visited the place, it suddenly become clear to me that these guys can be really big a**holes. Forgive my language. They don't exactly treat people with respect. So I suppose you can take pictures of them from afar, but not WITH them. Or you can dare yourselves and give it a shot.

Oh, yes! Another word of caution. Pickpockets are common in Rome. My uncle's camera got stolen while we were traveling on the train. Thank heavens he already uploaded all the photos into the net, or else we wouldn't have these lovely pictures. Gypsies will try to distract you by all means, and while they are at it, they will grab your purse, or wallet, or handbag and run away. This happened out in the open. My aunt almost got nabbed, had my cousins and I not pull her away and ahem... ahem... make offensive gestures at them to distract them instead. They were so busy 'replying' our rude gestures that they simply let go of my aunt. Haha...

L.O.S.E.R.S

Let's just hope my mates and I don't run into them this time. So, if anyone, especially young girls who smell like ciggarattes and have heavy eye shaodw approach you and touch your skin and stuff, as if praising your beauty, note three things:

1. Hold on to your valuables, and just rush away.

2. As one or two of them are sort of praising you, keep an eye for a third, or forth one.

3. You're not THAT beautiful for someone to just came up to you and compliment you.

So from the Colosseum we walked to the Roman Forum, which used to display the hustle and bustle of the capital of the Roman Empire. Since it was somewhere in early winter or end of autumn, it got dark quick.

It was fun visiting Rome. And I can't wait to go back there. But this time, my BFFs and I will be traveling across the entire of Italy. I can hardly wait. We leave for Milan tomorrow morning. We will gradually move up to Rome from Venice, Pisa, Florence and Naples.

I'm excited but also really nervous too. I hardly travel without my family. Last time I traveled to Scotland, I had a very caring and responsible senior to look after my mates and I. This time, its just us juniors. The thought kind of scares me sometimes. But I suppose with God's blessings, all will be fine.

God bless...

The Young Thief

There once was a young thief who lived in a big city. He meant no harm to anybody. He stole from the rich and kept in for himself. Thinking that by stealing only a small proportion of what would be a huge amount of priceless property, her personally felt he was not bringing any harm upon anything. Therefore, he never felt guilty or bad over his profession.

One night, he decided to steal from the house of a young man who had recently made much profit from his business. The man stayed in a small house outside the city all alone. After finding out that the man would be spending the night over at a relative's house, the thief decided to rob this man's house that night.

The task was relatively simple. There were no guards or anyone else around. Once inside, the young thief was shocked to see the entire house filled with gold coins. He was suddenly filled with greed. He decide to steal them all. He took them out in their bags and placed them outside the house one by one. After one, he would go in to get another one. To his surprise, there was another young man standing outside the house. He told the young thief not to be afraid as he would not report him. Instead, the young man offered to help the young thief carry all the bags of gold coins outside. Reluctantly, the thief agreed to let the young man help him.

Once all the bags were carried out. The thief said, "Dear friend, you have been so kind to help me out tonight. I have never stolen so much in my life. Here, have half of all these bags of gold coins. Accept them as a token of my gratitude."

The young man just smiled and replied, "It's alright, brother. I don't need them. This house belongs to me. And all these gold coins were earned by me from today's business. I am expecting to earn twice more this amount from tomorrow's sales. I am very much assured that you, my brother, must be in some huge financial difficulty, which has forced you to resort to making money like this. If not, surely a young and healthy youth such as yourself will never resort to such a sinful way of life. You may keep all the bags. I don't mind, brother."

The thief was so shocked to hear this he fell to the ground. He then realized how wasted his life has been all these years. He finally repented and began to live a new, clean way of life.

The moral of the story is, one does not have to resort to harsh ways to educate someone. By love and passion, one can achieve this goal, God bless.

The Billionaire's Wife

Once upon a time, there lived a rich young billionaire in a big city. He was proud and arrogant of the wealth he had inherited from his late father. He often looked down upon those who he felt were beneath him. In order to secure his social status, he married a beautiful girl. Unlike her husband, the billionaire's wife was modest and down to earth as she came from a middle-class background.

One night, the billionaire and his wife were in their grand mansion alone having dinner, celebrating their first wedding anniversary. The billionaire had sent all his servants on vacation so he could spend a romantic evening with his wife in private. As the couple were about to dig into their meal, there was a knock on the door.

"Who in the world could that be?" the billionaire grumbled as he went to get the door. To his surprise there was a beggar begging for food. He was new at the city and nobody would give him a job. He had not eaten for days and he was recently mugged off all his money. He had heard of the billionaire's wife's generosity and had come to her for food, and maybe even a job.

The billionaire's wife felt pity for the young beggar. She then packed him some food and gave it to him. When she invited him in to stay for the night, her husband pushed him away, saying that someone as lowly as him did not deserve to stay in his grand mansion. Ashamed, the beggar left the mansion with his food.

The incident that night opened the billionaire's wife's eyes of her husband's true colour. Since then, the two always fought and withing a year, it was fated that their marriage was not to last till death did them apart.

With the alimony she received, the billionaire's wife opened her own boutique and made lots of money. She also became partners with another budding businessman. In a short time, with all the hard work they put in, both the billionaire's wife and her business partner became billionaires in their own right. Soon, their friendship turned to love and they eventually got married.

One night, the couple were having dinner in occasion of their wedding anniversary. It was a romantic dinner and they were all alone at home. As they were having their meal, there was a knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" the billionaire's wife wondered as she went to see who was at the door. There was a poor beggar. It turned out that he used to have money, but he lost it all in gambling, woman and drinking and was now left poor. All he wanted was some food.

The billionaire's wife quickly packed some food for the beggar from what was left on their dinner table. Her husband even invited the beggar to stay with them for the night. He even offered to give him a job so that he will not have to beg anymore in his life.

However, the beggar turned down the billionaire's offer. He then walked away, ashamed. When the beggar had left, the billionaire's wife started to wept uncontrollably.

"Honey, what's wrong?" the billionaire asked.

"That beggar who came to us for food - he is actually my first husband, my dear. After he lost all his money, he simply disappeared. Now I know, he had actually become a beggar on the streets!" his wife revealed.

The billionaire was shocked to hear this surprising truth. But he smiled and said, "And do you know what? Do you remember the beggar who came to you for food two years ago? That was actually me. With God's grace, I have become who I am today."

The moral of the story is: when we have everything in life, never look down upon those who are less privileged than us. You might never know when God might just turn your world upside down.

Philipa

The face that used to look upon me with love and kindness now would not even look at me. Maddy walked into the car slowly; not even looking at me even once, as if I was a complete stranger. Whatever was going through his head right now must be making him go nuts. Anyone in his place would surely freak out to the maximum.

"It is going to be hard, Mrs. Iyer. I understand. But your husband does not have a clue who you are," Dr. McKenzie told me in her office a few days ago.

"Because of the crash? Amnesia?" I asked, after like what seemed like five minutes of awkward silence as I tried to digest the thought.

"Yes. But not amnesia in the right sense. Your husband has partial amnesia," the doctor explained.

"Meaning?"

"Only a part of her memories are lost. My guess would be from the last five years or so. He remembers being in Malaysia. But he has no clue of ever coming to Harvard to study law, or his internship here in New York."

I did not know what to say. My husband no longer know who I am.

"Would you like to see him?" the doctor asked.

She escorted me to his ward. There he was.

"Maddy... do you remember me? Do you know who I am?" I asked him, trying to look into his eyes.

He starred at me, his face full of puzzlement. Even before he shook his head, I knew his answer. It saddened me. Maddy, who was always full of joy and confidence, whose presence just filled once heart with happiness, never looked like this before.

"She's your wife, Madhavan. Madhumita. You remember me telling you about her just now, right?" Dr. McKinzie explained.

"My wife? What? What? I... I never got married! I'm only 16! Please! I want to go home! Can you call my parents please? Where am I? How did I get here? Please help me! Please!" and with that, the ever confident, ever manly husband I once knew began weeping like a child. I tried to hug him to comfort him. But he pushed me away.

***

On our way home, I tried to explain everything to Maddy. His parents turned him out after a big misunderstanding in the family. After getting his scholarship, he left Kuala Lumpur for Harvard with me. We started dating during our first year and love simply blossomed between us. We decided to get married after graduation. We had been on a year long internship under a special programme here in New York. We only had a few days more to return to Malaysia.

"This is our room, Maddy. Don't you remember it?" I showed him our house. He looked around puzzled. We had only been living here for a few months, but this was our first home together as husband and wife. It should trigger something. But the poor guy just starred around in strangely, as if he was completely alien to this place.

"Why don't you go wash up? I'll get dinner ready," I said and turned towards the kitchen.

"Can I have my own room... please?"

I remained calm. I then showed him to another room.

***

I told our boss at the law firm that Maddy will not be able to come over for his last few days of his internship because of his condition. The boss, Mr. Chadwick did not mind as he was already very much impressed with Maddy's work. But he regretted not being able to see him one last time before we return home to Malaysia, but promised to visit whenever he flies over.

Before leaving for home that day, I visited a friend from the Malaysian Embassy, who through some contacts had managed to get me details of Maddy's family. There was nothing much I could do if he could not remember me. All I could do was depend on his family.

"Hello, Mr. Iyer?" I asked the man on the other side.

"Yes... Who is this?" he asked back.

"I'm... I am Madhumita. I'm calling from New York, sir."

"Okay... Do I know you, girl?"

"No... we haven't actually met, sir. I'm a... a friend of Maddy's sir?"

"I'm sorry. Who?"

"Maddy, sir. Madhavan. Your youngest son?"

Suddenly, there was a long pause. All I could hear to was the noisy subway.

"Who is this, exactly?"

"I'm Madhumita. Madhavan's wife..." I forced those words out.

Again there was a short pause. But Mr. Iyer then asked synically, "Is this Philipa? Philipa Lee?"

"No, sir. I'm Indian. Naa Tamil, sir. Naa unge payee odei samsoro, sir. My name is Madhumita," I explained again, partially in Tamil so he did not mistaken me for a Chinese girl.

"Oh. Oh, I see," he seemed taken back for a moment. "Did... Did Madhavan ask you to call?"

I knew this was a big shock to him. But he seemed open to it.

***

When I got home with some vegetarian Chinese takeaway, Maddy was on the laptop. I forgot to knock, and he was startled to see me come in.

"I'm so sorry. I was all alone. There was nothing on TV. So I just went online for a while... I'm really sorry," Maddy apologized repeatedly.

"Hey, don't sweat it. It's your lappy, by the way. Mine I brought along to work. You can use it as long as you want," I explained. He then reluctantly took the food from me to lay out the table for dinner.

So he has always been like this - respectful and responsible. It was not something he grew into, but something he was very much part of.

It has been a few days since Maddy had returned home... and I was no longer a complete stranger to him. We could talk casually, although I could sense him feeling uncomfortable.

"Can I ask something?" he suddenly said as we were having dinner.

"Yeah, sure. Go ahead."

"Why... why did I run away from home?"

Suddenly, it hit me! I should not have told him he ran from home. His father was more than happy to have him home and pretend like nothing happened. His family missed him for all these years. He could have just gone home and everything could have been normal. But thanks to my big mouth...

"Well... you were in love with this girl from school. Your parents did not approve. They had you engaged to relative's niece or something. You two were to get married before going off to college. But you and this girl ran away and started living together. I don't know where but..."

"Living together? You mean... without getting married?" he was shocked.

"Yes... but that's fine. You both were young and you regretted doing that. And that was a long time ago..."

Maddy had turned sour. Of course, living in sin was a big crime according to his upbringing... our upbringing. When Maddy first told me this, I was taken back. Not just by this truth but by his honesty. Sure I was rather disappointed that not only I was not his first love, but I was not his first love partner. While in fact, I had prepared myself all for this. For this special moment to be enjoyed in the holy boundaries of matrimony.

"What happened then? Hold on. Were... Were you that girl I ran off with?" he asked.

"No. No, I wasn't. You had a scholarship and a good place at a local college for your foundation before you leave for Harvard. That girl had nothing. She was from a rich family, but she was bad at school and had no future. Her future was either you... or returning back to her family."

"But we decided to stay on together, right?"

"No. Obviously not. She went back to her family. You were too ashamed to go home. I remember you during first day of orientation. You were a mess. You remember anything of that day?"

He shook his head.

"Well... I suppose you really liked her. No... she must have been your first love. You were crazy during your first year. Lost of drinking, cigarettes, drugs... You mixed with the wrong company too. Lots of clubbing... hell knows what else you did. One day some of your friends got caught and were expelled. I suppose you and a few others were safe as they had nothing on you.

"Then do you remember the first week of our second year? We were in the same tutor group. That's how we became... close. I took you to temple. You cried when we went in. It was the first time in months for you..."

Maddy had his eyes fixed on me... never leaving me... like he did when we were in love... "Then?"

"Well... we became friends. Then, we dated. It was the first time for me. You were special. We did everything together, you and me. Your grades just shot up. You were recovered from the heartbreak. You became yourself again..."

Dinner ended on a gloomy note. We had never talked so much about Maddy's past. The doctor had said that there was no saying when he would regain his memory. It could take days, weeks, months, maybe even years!

How were we supposed to live together until then? He was nothing more than a teenager now. Only his family would know what to do. Taking him home would be what is best for him at the moment.

As I got ready for bed, I noticed Maddy's laptop still switched on. He had simply left it like that when I walked in. His Facebook was still unlogged. He had saved his password and that had made things easy for him. I was curious to know what he had been searching for.

Phillipa Lee.

He had just sent her a friend request. When I checked his GMail, he had also sent her an e-mail.

Of course! He was still in love with her! There was only her in his heart now. What if he left her for Philipa?

She wanted to tell him the truth. The truth that she had been hiding from him for months now. But now is not the time. That's for sure.

Just then, the phone rang...

"Alan, not now. I meant what I said during the Christmas party. It's over!" And I switched off my phone. Then I rushed to my room and jumped on the bed, forcing myself to fall asleep. But that did not work. I could not hold back the tears any longer. I just sobbed. Sobbed uncontrollably...

***

It's funny how not spending time with your loved one for so long can suddenly make you appreciate every single detail of them. As Maddy got preoccupied with his work, we hardly spent time during the last few months. Now, just everything about him simply touched me.

I loved the way he would always make sure he would be at the door first, just so he could open it for me. I loved the way he rushed to the table first, just so he could pull the chair out for me to sit first. I loved how he always insisted he carried the bags for me. I loved how he made sure my hair was always in place before I left home. I loved catching him staring at me for what could be hours my eyes were fixed on the telly watching my favourite show. I loved that he always held my hand when we were walking, and always being so overprotective each time we were crossing a busy street in the heart of the Big Apple.

Today, he reminded me of all that and lots more when he made sure he carried every one of our luggage to the trolley. Then as we stood in line to be checked by the immigration officers, he took my passport from my hands and showed them at the counter. This is what I had been missing all these while... this tenderness, this lovingness, this warmth, this protectiveness... this love....

Then there they were - the Iyer family. There was a middle-aged couple - Mr and Mrs. Iyer. Then there were around half a dozen siblings, all awaiting our arrival. The once alpha male husband of mine suddenly abandoned me as he ran to his parents in tears, hugging them dearly, apologizing repeatedly. As the family invited me into the circle of hugging and tears, I bowed before my in-laws a sign or respect, and Mrs. Iyer and the sisters embraced me, welcoming me into their family.

Having been brought up at an orphanage, I had never felt what it was like being a part of a conventional Tamil family. But now, I knew. And it was the best feeling in the world - and no man could take that away from me, God bless.

***

Now, I was finally home. It had not changed much. It was still the same corner load, double story semi-detached 'taman' house in one of Kuala Lumpur's suburbs. Just next door lived my uncle and his family. Only a few miles away, an aunt lived with her family. All of them were at home to welcome me with a surprise party.

My cousins - Jeya, Mani, Lalitha, Naina, Arjun... how they had grown. The boys were taller than me. Imagine how shocked I must have been when I noticed those bulging biceps on me. And now here was Mani and Arjun who could barely reach my shoulders the last time I remember, now towering above me with physiques that could put professional wrestlers to shame!

Mom, dad, my uncles and my aunts were older. Their hair had silvered in time. Dad and uncle had retired. Mom got promoted. But of course I would not know. Even if I had my memory, I would not remember since I ran away.

And when I was shown my room, Madhu was already in it. She starred back at me as I walked in. Of course, it must be still awkward for her since I had forgotten my memory. I was not the man she had fallen in love with. I was just a boy.

I was shown to my old room then. My pictures from school were still on the wall. Only my stubbly face had unchanged. My body was as skinny as a matchstick back in those days. Dad never approved of sports. It was always books and studies 24/7.

There was my class photo from my senior year. I was assistant prefect. Next to me was a Chinese girl whose face seemed to be cut out from a movie magazine and glued there.

Philipa.

***

The next morning, I received the best gift I could have asked for. Philipa had approved my friend request. She was excited to finally get in touch with me. She was working in Singapore. She was in Kuala Lumpur the following week with a client and wanted to meet me at the cafe not too far from my place, which was still there.

I could hardly believe it. I was going to meet her. It was as if she had never left me. It was as if everything Madhu had told me never happened. Philipa was still my one and only. The thought of her having left me just baffled me. Even before marriage, we had solemnized our vows. Together forever. She always said that. Always! And now this Madhu girl was telling me she left me to be with her family!

Madhu...

Maybe it was because we had stayed in the same house for some time since I was discharged from that American hospital, I was somewhat fond of her presence. True, she was beautiful. But her beauty can never match Philipa's.

But she must have been a good wife, right? If she can have the patience to stay with me and never loose hope on me, despite me not remembering ever loving another girl besides my Philipa, I suppose that makes her an amazing person. She would make a great wife, if she could stay this loyal and sincere for one man. Had not I met Philipa, I suppose I would have fallen for Madhu...

What?! No! Cut it out! Enough of this nonsense! There was only Philipa, and Philipa alone! There is no place for another woman in my heart, may she be as admirable as Madhu.

I pretended to be asleep. At two in the morning, I crept out. Everyone was fast asleep. I walked to the 'mamak' cafe. It was renovated over the years, and now looked almost like a fancy restaurant. I walked inside. And there she was...

My Philipa...

All I could do was rush to her and hold her in my arms for as long as I could. I never wanted this moment to end.

"Maddy, it's great to meet you too. But you need to get off. People are looking. This is Malaysia, not America, darling..." she pushed me away, though tenderly.

For about half an hour or so, we just starred at each other, then the wall, then the ceiling, then the floor, then the street, then back to each other, and then the circle repeated.

There she was. My Philipa. Looking as beautiful as ever. Her hair was shorted now, and brown. She was puffing away, a habit she had not seemed to have forgotten.

"It's so good to see you, Maddy. It really is," she said and held my hand. Then, once again there was that awkward silence.

"So, you're a lawyer now. It was your dream, wasn't it? Not like me. Selling myself off for money. Strangers using me for their own lust. It's like that - Singapore. It's like that in every big city."

I was speechless. A call girl?

"How is everyone at home? You haven't been home since college, have you? How's your parents? Your brothers and sisters? Your cousins? How are they all?"

"Yeah... they're all good. Happy to have me back. More happier than I had expected..."

Then once again, the silence followed. Hell! How did this happen? It was like only yesterday we last met, literally for me at least. But for her it mush be ages!

"Is something wrong, Maddy? Do you want to tell me something? Is there a girl in your life? A girlfriend?"

I looked away.

"There has to be someone, right? Bright, intelligent, matured, family girl... so unlike me!" she said with a painful chuckle.

I could not leave this unanswered. "Yes, Philipa. I do have someone with me..."

She looked stunned, but quickly washed it out with a smile - the same way she always did every time I shocked her with a sad news. I knew. I remembered.

"What's her name, Maddy? Tell me about her. Please?" she pleaded.

"She's a really nice girl, Philipa. Most beautiful I've ever seen. Being in love with her is like living in a Bollywood film or something. Almost as tall as me, slim and simple. Loves talking about everything. She can never live without me. Always texts or calls me whenever I'm not around. her. She changed me as a person. I became a rebel of some sort. Looking back at my life, it made me look so wasted! Like, why haven't I met her before? She never thinks badly about people. She always has the best of intentions. I still remember her last words to me: together forever..."

This time the shock on Philipa's face can never be washed out with any smile of any length. It must have been a big blow to her that I was still in love with her... very much in love with her.

"This cannot be, Maddy."

"Why? You have someone else?"

"No! It's just... your wife!"

"My... my wife?"

"And also... I'm not the same Philipa. It's been so many years. People change. The world changes. I've changed. I may not like giving myself to other men, but the price of it is to die for. I'm almost a millionaire myself now. Next week, my latest client is taking me to Prague. Then, maybe even Toronto perhaps. All I need to do is to be with him. You loose some, you win some. But I'm happy. Happier than I have ever been. I have some contacts now. Great contacts. One day I will be back here in Kuala Lumpur. I will open my ownboutique. And I will make money of my own. But not now. Someday... when I'm so old that even plastic surgery cannot keep me beautiful, but the money and property I've collected over the years can provide for me the life I'm already living now. But for now... this is my life."

"Philipa..." I tried to hold her hand. But she pulled away.

"It's no use, Maddy. You will always be my first love. And for that you will always have a special place in my heart. But I cannot give you my entire heart. It's been so many years, Maddy. Don't tell me you haven't moved on. Go away, Maddy. Please..." She turned and ran away, towards her car parked up front.

I rushed after her. My eagerness to catch her seemed to make me bounce in thin air... The motorcycle that hit me did a somersault over my body and crashed on the road as I landed hard on the rood of Philipa's car.

"Maddy!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I heard her scream. No, it was not her.

***

Thank God nobody was badly injured. My husband's head was bleeding and he was unconscious. But nothing serious. We rushed him to the nearest hospital in Philipa's car. I could only pray that God kept him safe. There was so much more I had to tell him. So much more. Or I would never get forgiveness.

He was still in deep sleep when I went in to see him. I tried combing him hair. I wanted him to look as handsome as he always was. But when I walked out, I was in for a shock of a lifetime.

"Alan!" I gasped. What was Mr. Chadwick doing here?

"I was in the city on business. I came to this hospital because a client is here admitting a friend. What are you doing here?" Alan was as charming as ever. And he was not even trying.

"Errr... Maddy met with another accident. But it was just a small one. He is fine. He is resting. Listen, you really should not be here..."

"You made yourself quite clear, Madhu. No more pressure from my side. It simply baffles me how you can still stay loyal to him. Partial amnesia is just as bad as normal amnesia. It could take years for him to recover. Or he might never even regain his memory. You really think it is worth all this? You're so young. And beautiful. You could have anyone..."

"And I choose my husband. Now can you please leave?" I begged him, but I was almost shouting. A few nurses and patients waiting along the corridor turned towards us. Embarrassed, Alan left without another word.

Philipa was seated at a corner, deep in thought. She was still in love with Maddy as much Maddy was in love with her. Except she was consumed by the materialistic world she lived in. The thought of loosing her Maddy to death must be killing her from the inside.

This was the time. This was what was right. This was what I was fated to do. God be with me. I walked to Philipa, my heart heavy, but never having been more sure of something.

***

"It was you wasn't it?" those were his first words when he gained conscious. "The one at the cafe. You screamed out my name when I got hit. It was you wasn't it?"

I nodded, the tears streaming out of my eyes. It was not easy, but God was with me. What had been fated had been decided. I was not quiting on the man I loved. In fact, I was fighting for him, even if it meant letting him go.

"Maddy, I've talked to Philipa. You won't be surprised. But she never exactly meant what she said last night. She is ready. She is willing to start over. She is ready to start anew."

"What? I don't get it..."

"She still loves you. You are all hers. She is waiting for you outside. You're all hers..."

Maddy could not believe his ears. Of course. His one true love all his again. He got up slowly, but steadily. He was ready to embrace his love. He walked towards me... for the door. But he stopped before me. Never had he been so close to me in months...

"Madhu..." he called my name, also the first in a long, long time. "I thought I only had Philipa. But you were there, too. It is not just important that you love someone. It also matters that the person loves you back. Or else, the love is pointless. I ran away from life once, only to end up disappointed. And I'm not doing that again..."

"But, Philipa..."

"Shush..." he placed his finger on my lips, silencing me. "Last night, when I was telling Philipa about the girl I loved, it was not her. It was you... The love I forgot, you've reminded me of in just that one week of loving and caring for me..."

"But that Alan! I've always wanted to tell you..."

"No, no, no... I know about him. It's all slowly coming back to me. I know about you and him. But I don't care. You could have left me for him with me in this condition. But, you didn't. You stayed with me. All because you loved me..."

And then I wept, unable to control myself. "It was a stupid mistake. You were always away... and it was just one night. One date. One meaningless date. That's all! I feel so stupid. Please forgive me..."

But Maddy was silent. He came down on his knee. Looking up at me, with his round doe eyes, he said, "Madhu, will you fall in love with me? All over again? Like how I'm falling in love with you right now? Please. will you?"

***

As I looked in through the glass window, I saw the young husband and wife embrace each other in a long, passionate kiss. I knew my feeble attempt in making Maddy pursue me like before would not work at this rate. I was ready to let go of my world of dreams for a world of love. Guess it is world of dreams back again.

"Philipa? Philipa Lim?" a deep voice called out behind me. I turned around. There he was. Most of the men who have me are these old, lifeless billionaires. But here was a white hunk who despite his middle age, could be easily mistaken for a Hollywood hunk.

"Ah. Mr. Chadwick. I must say you don't look as handsome as your picture. But you will do."

"I say, you're rather picky, for a call-girl."

"No! No! Not any call-girl. You know my clients, don't you? If I were a just a call-girl, I won't be charging at the rate you have to pay me, right? So, shall we proceed? Where are we to after Prague? Toronto, right?"

"Oh. Change of plans. I have to go back to New York for a couple of days. But you're welcomed to join me there as well."

"Well, you can talk to my manager. I charge triple for change of schedules without prior notice. But that would do just fine."

***

As the two unlikely couple left the hospital building, attracting much attention with their matching good looks and the chemistry they shared as they walked the corridors, the true couple left the ward.

It was love all over the air for Maddy. He was falling in love again, with the same woman. And Madhu had her man by her side. No more secrets, no more lies. Just love for a lifetime.

As they walked away from their past, Maddy held his wife's hand close to him, his eyes telling hers he would never let go of her again.

Ever...

***